A Fowl Run

I made a new enemy today and he looks just like this.

Normally I wouldn’t put out 2 back-to-back posts about workouts.  But today’s run was too bizarre not to document.

Coach Hadley’s plan had me running 10 x 1-minute repeats with 2-minute recovery jogs.   The prescribed pace was 5:35 – 5:45/mile.

There’s a nice little crushed gravel trail about a half mile away from my condo.  The trail’s roughly a quarter mile oval;  flat, rarely used, and therefore a perfect spot for speed workouts.  So I jogged over there this morning.

When I reached the trail, while I was running a couple of laps as part of my warm-up, I intruded upon 2 families of geese (do 2 families equal one gaggle?) loitering dead smack in the center of the ‘track’.  As I ran right through the middle of them, they scattered, the babies honking hysterically while the parents hissed and spread their wings, ostensibly in an attempt to initimidate me.  But I ignored them since they got out of the way, albeit begrudgingly.  They had scattered off to the sides and into the water, but as soon as I passed, they casually settled back down on the trail.

When I started running at speed, this apparently upset them more.  With each subsequent pass, the 2 heads of household (moms or dads?) got more and more aggressive.  Initially, they simply hissed and spread their wings in my direction.  But by the fourth or fifth pass, things got really nasty.

As I quickly motored by, mom or dad decided to get serious.  This time it flew at me.  I turned around, running backwards to face my attacker.  He/she was flying rapidly towards me – a collision seemed imminent.  I stopped and feigned a punch (I learned this trick from hours spent watching MMA fights) and the airborne goose stopped on a dime, in mid-flight, actually pretty impressive stuff.  I stood there and screamed at it, “Hey, stupid, get out of the way!” (This is the very abridged, rated-G recap.  The longer, live version included much more profanity.) 

Thank god no one was out there with a video camera.  The incident would have undoubtedly resulted in YouTube infamy.  I really, really wanted to do this

Ultimately, the geese prevailed.  Since Mark’s plan made no mention of sparring with geese, I decided it behooved me to finish this workout elsewhere.  Luckily, there’s a second dirt track directly across the street.  It’s typically not quite as advantageous a spot for speed work because it has a rather sharp incline at one end.  But today it won out – better to run a steep hill then fight a gaggle of geese.

When I finished my intervals, I had to trot back over to Goose Oval to retrieve a bottle of Gatorade I had stashed earlier.  When I got there, the geese were peacefully swimming in the pond.  Really?  You guys couldn’t have done this half an hour ago?  Jerk geese.  Makes me want to buy an Australian Blue Heeler just to reign havoc on those feathered maniacs

Quality workout number two in the books.  I’m hoping geese fighting will somehow help prepare me for the marathon – maybe it helps one toughen mentally.  Maybe ‘the big bonk’ will seem easy after duking it out with a gander.

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One Response to “A Fowl Run”

  1. aaron Says:

    love me minuters! Darn geese. Sometimes they get fiesty at McAlpine too 🙂

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